About Me, NaBloPoMo 2017, The Family That...

Fighting For Love

 

Going through some old boxes I came across the loveliest cards from our anniversary almost seven years ago.  (On a side note, one really has to wonder why I have a box of stuff so old that hasn’t been sorted through.  Epic organization fail.)  Back then we were so joyful, so full of life and love.  Now, we are more apt to fight than give each other kind words.

Like tonight. When he put off our date night because he had a work project then didn’t work on the project at all for hours instead napping and watching TV.

I didn’t think it was wrong to express my disappointment and hurt at the trade off.  I know he wasn’t feeling great.  I know he prefers to procrastinate.  Why does that make it okay?  Why do I get to be the one hurt for his convenience?

I feel like I’m fighting to be loved and not ignored.  I wish it would help.

Advertisements
About Me, The Family That...

10 Things About Papa

I have had quite a few great men in my life, but I wanted to share 10 things about my Papa.  Great at games, always ready with a smile, fun, dependable, and humble.

1. Hide and seek when you came home from work.

2. The doll house you built me.

3. Riding bikes with you and Nana around the neighborhood.

4. What’s your name?  Puddin’ tang.

5. Staying the weekend at your house.  And the whole summer.

6. Going to church together.  Signing us in.

7. Riding the tractor with you.

8. Being on stage when you were in the audience.

9. Your smile.

10. How much I knew you loved me.

I love you and I miss you still, Papa.

This post is linked up over at Monday Listicles.  The prompt?  Write about one of the men in your life.

Holidays

The Simple Joys of Christmas

I spent time today out at the mall attempting to cross more people off my Christmas list.

I realized two things while I was out and about.

One – I loathe the mall and shopping with a dark, unreasoning passion.

Two – I miss the simple joys of Christmas.

Hope.

Love.

Faith.

Family.

Friends.

Peace.

Looking around at the stores, other people shopping, and excessive amounts of cheap and tacky gifts I was filled with a sense of how much goes to waste for this one day: wrapping paper, gift bags, money, time, overseas jobs, social connection, the soul of the holiday.

Suddenly, dazed, I felt weird about buying anything.  I walked out to my car wondering why this was hitting me so hard.  Is it the Christmas music before Veteran’s Day?  Black Friday sales on Thanksgiving?  How does this Christmas end up feeling not like the most joyous time of the year but instead more like the last, best hope for sucking money out of my wallet?

That is why this year everyone is getting coal.  Or a sock from Goodwill.  Your choice.  If you’re on my list I apologize in advance.

I hope for your sakes that I snap out of this Christmas funk soon.