A year into playing hookie from a job with a decent salary, vacation time, and health benefits and I’m scared out of my wits.
Some people, like internet music superstar, Jonathan Coulton, can take a year off and turn straw into gold. Others like me, take that year and mostly squander it away in a drunken, drug-induced haze. Hrrmm…okay…that DID NOT happen…however when I am a rock star/brain surgeon/samurai it will.
Jeff Goldblum is DEAD sexy.
Alright, alright, I haven’t completely squandered the last year. I have accomplished some cool things. Even more importantly I’ve learned.
Learned things like I value my freedom and loathe working the 9-5 cubicle type job. I enjoy being in charge and leading a team. I don’t tolerate carelessness or stupidity. I’m a hard-ass but I succeed in getting my underlings to learn along the way. The underlings like me.
I’ve done way too little acting and singing and painting (despite my Painting of the Month project…YIKES!). I’ve done a lot of crying, a lot of fighting, a lot of being depressed. I’ve hidden myself from myself and those who love me best.
Sticking my neck out even further by putting on a HUGE hobby show makes me freak out even more. A show that if it flops will leave me up debt creek without any extra dollars.
Only two weeks away and I’m dreaming about the show, eating, sleeping and breathing this damned show. But in the end it IS going to work out. It has to. How do I know? ‘Cause if you’re scared shitless you must be doing it right.